MOO 14: What Did You Think We Meant?
by Amanita Jackson
Summary: Month O' Oneshots 14! SiriusRemus, Remus is writing an essay so he doesn't get detention over break because of the incident in Potions. Sirius, off scot free, tries to convince him to partake in a repeat of Potions class. Snape eavesdrops. Humor ensues.


A/N: This was just so fun to write. I love these guys. Yes, it's one of the huge popular pairings, but they're just so CUTE together. Incidentally, at the fair the other day I saw this couple that looked just like I thought they would. I also saw a cuople that looked like Blaise/Seamus. The Sirius/Remus couple were walking around with their arms around each toehr's shoulders. I only saw them once, but it was so adorable...But the Blaise/Seamus couple was THE cutest...I was on one of the rides and they were waiting in line with two girls, probably their girlfriends (boo!) and they were standing and just talking and the ride went by and I was like "Hmm...they're cute...ZOMG ARE THEY HOLDING HANDS? ZOMG ZOMG THEY ARE THAT IS SOCUTE!" Cos they were facing each other leaning on the railing (Seamus was blocking the girls' view) and it looked like they were just friends talking but they had theitr hands really casually on the railing and they were holding hands. IT WAS SO FREAKING ADORABLE! (cough) ahem. Anyway. Movin' on. I started writing this for Blaise and Seamus but then I was like nahhh...these lines are so Sirius.

MOO: #14

Pairing: Sirius/Remus

Dedication: For Gill, my bestie, because you would find this most amusing.

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters from this fandom. At all. I am not making any money from this. So on, so forth, et cetera, et cetera.

Warning: Slash. Very mild language.

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"Come on. You know you want to," Sirius purred, snaking his arms around Remus' slim waist. "Christmas is a time for tricks and _fun_ of all kinds."

"No. Holidays are a time for sleeping in. We have two days of school before then. This essay _is _due tomorrow, you realise," Remus replied mildly. "Hence my frantic studying in this section of the library."

"Awww," Sirius pouted. "You have plenty of time to do the essay. Besides, this'll be more fun than some sodding Potions homework."

"It isn't homework. It's to keep me out of detention. If I do this essay on _why_ students are not to do what we were doing in class, then I am detention free. If, however, I 'see fit to forgo the essay,' as he so understandingly put it, I am scrubbing bedpans, trophies, floors, walls, cobblestones, the village of Hogsmeade, and anything else that Slug idiot can think up. Without magic. With my toothbrush," Remus said, sulking.

Sirius grinned. "It were fun though. Once break starts, we can do stuff like that even more, cos there'll be no classes to pretend to pay attention in! It'll be fun," he cajoled.

Remus slapped down his quill and turned with a resigned expression. "You want me to get detention, don't you. You really do. Sadist."

"No, that's Slughorn, dear," Sirius chirped. "Besides. Just think: if you're off wandering the castle after everyone else has gone to bed, I could nick Prongsy's cloak and we could--"

"No. No. Furthermore…no. Be good for once."

Sirius waggled his eyebrows. "Oh, but I _am_ good. You said so yourself, after Potions this morning."

"Well, that was brilliant, I will grudgingly admit, but I am still facing detention unless I write three more feet for this essay. Which reminds me," Remus added sourly, "I notice _you_ didn't get an essay."

Sirius shrugged. "Probably my charming good looks." Remus rolled his eyes. "Or possibly because I am sodding brilliant at Potions, and indeed, everything and anything I choose to do. Speaking of which--" he began.

"NO. And that is final. Why don't you just get one of the other lads to do it with you?"

Sirius heaved a dramatic sigh. "Because my darling wolf boy, Prongsy is too busy lusting after Evans, Tails is occupied with bringing his girlfriend home to mummy, and all the other lads would be too intimidated."

Remus snorted in disbelief. Sirius pouted.

"I doubt _any_one would be intimidated. Amateur," Remus smirked.

Sirius fell off the arm of the chair in surprise. Remus picked up his abandoned quill and continued writing. Sitting up on the floor, Sirius did his infamous puppy eyes at Remus.

"I am not an amateur, as you well know," he sulked. "Pleeease? I'm really bored."

"So read," Remus said unconcernedly. Inwardly, he was snickering. Heh. Sirius was so easy to rile up.

"Pff. Reading. I want a repeat of Potions class."

"What, Snape spilling potion on Prongsy, me getting yelled at by Slughorn,--" Remus recalled blandly.

"No, no, the _fun_ part. Come on. That isn't due till tomorrow," Sirius said. This suggestion was met with stony silence. "I'll help if you get detention," he tried again. He was rewarded with a sigh of defeat and the sound of a quill and parchment being shoved across the table.

"Okay, fine, fine. But I'm using your toothbrush to scrub the floors and everything."

"Fair enough," Sirius grinned. "And we can do more stuff over break too, right?" he asked eagerly. Remus sighed in defeat. Again.

"Very well. What prank did you have in mind?"

"Well, the one from Potions today where we turned Snivellus' rucky into doxies was pretty funny," began Sirius thoughtfully. "But that one from last week in Transfiguration where we charmed Professor Rushford's hat into singing The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All was good if--"

"_THAT'S_ what you lot were talking about?" came an incredulous voice from the table next to theirs.

"Yes, Snivellus," Sirius said in contempt. "What did you _think_ we meant?"

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Heh, this is one of the few stories I've written that I actually like. Now come on. You know what time it is. Review time. Go on. Click the Go button down there for submit a review. If you don't belong to you can still review. Seriously. You can. Try it. (points helpfully to button)


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